Time to Settle The Score in the Battle of the Sexes!

It is my position the battle of the sexes, we're both equally amazing and equally retarded. Yes. I used the R word. Because we are both slow to learn anything if we're being honest. We're also both to blame for a lot of things.

This claim that women are conniving and men are dogs is kinda ridiculous if you think about it. Because there are plenty of men who are conniving with a better hand of cards to play. These are the types of men who prey on a woman's emotional need for intimacy and financial stability with promises and lots of words that had no commitment or intentions behind them. Equally, there are a few women in the world who truly qualify as stereotypical b*tches using men for personal gain and stature. It goes both ways. Who's kidding who here? 

When you look at the crazy mothers

Mr. Right Now

It would sooooo be nice to have a Mr. Right Now.
   Reality remains I get phone calls nearly every night from a potential Mr. hoping to sway me and charm me into his life...and most often his bed.... yet, I can't really seem to bring myself to any kind of satisfaction.  Am I just being too picky?  I suppose.  However, if the chemistry isn't right then, I guess you just keep moving forward. At least this chick does.

I had an amazing time with someone new for the past few weeks.  He was on Spring Break ... from...drumroll... his girlfriend!  lol!  That's real life I suppose.  He was one scandalous adventure mixed with a sincere heartfelt tingle followed by a first point of contention leading to a big question mark for both of us.

Like all the others, it ends with him talking with his ex and believing a girl like me doesn't actually know he's still seeing her.  I am quiet.  Not stupid.  Big difference.  I'm a Vegas girl.  And in the story of my life the House always wins... meaning

Meow... lick... purr.... RAWR! (claws)

Let me start softly to my male audience and simply ask a question:
     What the f*@% is wrong with you guys?  Do you really think that all women just use men for money?  Do you really truly think only if you spend lots of money you will get us to sleep with you?  The truth is it helps.. but really?! 

Look, if I don't like you it doesn't matter how much money you spend on me... and although some girls will let you, I wouldn't even let myself feel even remotely obligated to you if you're shelling out cash to try and win my affection!  There's a difference between treating a lady as a princess and trying to buy her love. There's either chemistry or there's not... and yes, I do charge for kisses that suck!

The reality remains, if I don't actually like you,

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

What's up with men and pillow talk?

Perhaps I was married for a very long time to an abnormal man but, the men I've ventured into rendezvous with lately seemingly want to talk after even the most exasperating and exhausting sex. Why is that?

I'm completely comfortable with him going to sleep or running off to the next business meeting. This whole thing of pillow talk is new to me. Maybe I'm just getting older? Who knows... I do have questions about this.... Do men do it for the girl? Is it theatrics because
they've been conditioned to try and bond mentally with a girl after sex for the girl's sake so they don't seem like a d*ckhead?  Do men simply feel this is a great opportunity to see if there are actually brains behind the beauty so he will know if he should ask her to dinner prior to sex next time? Do men like to do this for themselves because they aren't complete animals and do desire intimacy after physical needs are met? Is this simply girlish desires of intimacy and physical touch in reverse?  I just don't get it.

Here's what prompted the quandary to begin with:

My latest joy ride had the pure adrenaline rush and enjoyment of a girl lap dancing on top of his erogenous appendage to LMFAO Sorry for Party Rockin and when finished with his 'release' fell fast asleep.

I have a rule.  It's a simple one.  And it's only one.  Don't spend the night.

This rule doesn't work for every girl but it works for me. On occasion (pending the company) this rule is bent to "don't spend the night unless invited." However, in my world most often I decline anyway. I'm not cold-hearted.... (well, maybe a little....) I'm just not into it...

It's not that I don't enjoy cuddling. Quite the contrary. It's simply that I don't feel the need to get comfortable and fall into the trap of creating bonds with someone I knowingly don't want all because it felt good at the time. I don't cuddle with strangers.

When sticking to my rules I find lines don't get crossed as easily establishing clearly defined boundaries for a man.  In this same way he understands plainly and clearly I wasn't conquered (because I wanted it for me) and that I don't have attachment issues. It pretty much spells out "Not the girl having sex looking for love. Just the girl entertaining amazing sex." This way I can be clear that I don't want anything more from him and that he's not material worth keeping. Is it so hard to imagine a girl simply enjoyed the same physical touch he did?

What delights me most is when my leaving takes him by surprise (as if I were a hopeless romantic - which I secretly am) and I'm looked at as callous.

Yes, some girls are like this. Why? Well.. does it matter? Because the truth is, I'm not sleeping with nice guys. I'm sleeping with the bumbling a**holes who think they can take advantage of a girl who wrote the playbook to whatever f*ed up game he thinks he's playing. There's no ego trip for him here. He will always be left to wonder why I didn't stay. Why I'm not a typical girl. And with that, his lingering question "was his sex bad?" will play in his mind for a while. Not my issue. Not my insecurity. I make no apologies.

We've all had our ups and downs in love. Maybe it's not really so hard to understand how men and women aren't truly that different. -I*V




(Originally posted 12/14/2012)

Pillow Talk ... I Just Don't Get It!

I know in my last chapter I mentioned not staying the night. But, I did cross a line with my latest victim... er... suitor. I didn't mean to. It's just that he was kinda cozy while I adjusted my pulse to normal levels and indulged in a few (very few) minutes of cuddling after what turned out to be high caloric burning sexcapades. I tried to lull him to sleep afterwards. I was married once and some habits die hard. But the truth is I was hoping he'd fall fast asleep so I could sneak out... No questions asked, just an easy escape!

While making my great escape I fumbled accidentally making a ruckus trying to find my panties he threw across

I'll be your Diamond Girl!

My fantasy... To be a man's 

"Diamond Girl!   Yes.. yes I totally do!

                             Diamond Girls have wayyyy more fun!

From I*V's favoritest place of earth... Fredrick's of Hollywood.com

I think "Diamond Girl" seems fitting for me.  However unlikely, I was thinking on things yesterday driving along with my Supervillian Venom Lipgloss gleaming (that tastes like dreamsickles) and
how I completely understand high-end prostitutes.  You know, the kind that get on Madame what's her names list and become headline news.  The kind that become politicians playmates... 

They are an absolute fantasy.  Fantasy can be extremely good:  On demand.  Up for adventure and fun without the baggage.  It ends when it ends.  No loose strings.  No wondering.  No commitment.  No monogomy.. although one of the parties typically ends up wanting more.  Especially the men doing the spoiling.  They love you to be theirs... and only theirs. 

The secrecy of it all is alluring. Getting caught adds tension to the thrill.  The discretion or lack there of, is an adrenaline rush.  The fact remains, there are women like me who do know how to give