Pillow Talk ... I Just Don't Get It!

I know in my last chapter I mentioned not staying the night. But, I did cross a line with my latest victim... er... suitor. I didn't mean to. It's just that he was kinda cozy while I adjusted my pulse to normal levels and indulged in a few (very few) minutes of cuddling after what turned out to be high caloric burning sexcapades. I tried to lull him to sleep afterwards. I was married once and some habits die hard. But the truth is I was hoping he'd fall fast asleep so I could sneak out... No questions asked, just an easy escape!

While making my great escape I fumbled accidentally making a ruckus trying to find my panties he threw across
the room. I'm convinced he did this intentionally.

I find men will fling panties for two reasons and two reasons only:
One: So you can't actually quietly escape without what he feels might be the walk of shame (um.. no shame here) and
Two: Because if you do escape but don't want to risk the middle of the night scavenger hunt in the pitch dark, you will most likely leave him a souvenir to remember you by. (Yea, some boys like to sniff it while they give themselves handjobs. True-Story!

Tip toeing around to see how sound a sleeper he is was not as fun as playing lava when I was a kid.
I continued searching for my top and bottoms somewhat loudly so he would focus on going to sleep and not on every microscopic sound he hears wondering what I'm doing. Finding my earrings on the night stand I slipped them back in so I didn't lose them in the stairwell. Then I quietly took the car keys off the bookshelf, delicately put the cell phone in my bra hoping the light wouldn't wake him, and gently balancing my sparkly heels in the other other hand at a safe distance hoping the rhinestones wouldn't snag my new shirt.

Heading toward the bedroom door he woke. "Are you leaving?" he said.

"Yes, Sweetie. Thanks for everything. I had fun," I said with a smile trying not to make him feel like anything was wrong.

Then he said it. He said the something I will never understand because I never had it until I started sleeping with strangers. He said, "Are you mad at me?"

"What?  Honey, why would I be mad at you?"

"Because I feel asleep..." he explained. "Do you want to talk?  I can stay awake and we can talk if you want." I found it somewhat pathetic. Not pathetic on his part but pathetic on the part of whoever conditioned him to go against his physiological need and his body's desire for sleep after an amazing orgasm.

Maybe I'm just the odd girl out. I just wasn't conditioned that way nor have I lied to myself about the reason I was in his bed to begin with.  I'm dealing with one thing at a time. Right now it's physical needs only. The emotions side of me is closed for business. If there's going to be talking, I want it to be ahead of time leading me into the moment...not taking what was not intimate and trying to make it something more with words to make the girl feel better about something she agreed she wanted.

It does seem however that maybe men talk for their sake and not just the girls? But... I really don't know...

I don't mind talking to a man and do purely enjoy the very few talks I've entertained with men who lie to themselves all day long about what they want in an effort to seem manly but, who also feel the need to bond intimately when the physical rush of adrenaline and serotonins are gone.

I can't conclude yet where the lines are drawn on this whole pillow talk thing.
Carnal is good for some but, do real men actually enjoy pillow talk for their own development?

I find pillow talk odd and interesting all the same. I find a lot of honesty there. Then again, a dear friend of mine said it best, "The greatest truths and the greatest lies ever told all happen - in bed."

Pillow talk.

This is very new for me.  Men trust me.  I have no idea why.  The truth of the matter is, I do keep their secrets safe...We all deserve someone in life who will truly listen to us as we are, or even as we want to be - even if only for a night.  It's all relevant and has it's place.  Even if it stays between the sheets. Even if it's not at all who we are in reality and just a made up version of the man he believes this girl wants him to be.

- XoXo -
   I*V

(Original Post 12/14/2012)