Should I Stay or Should I Go?

What's up with men and pillow talk?

Perhaps I was married for a very long time to an abnormal man but, the men I've ventured into rendezvous with lately seemingly want to talk after even the most exasperating and exhausting sex. Why is that?

I'm completely comfortable with him going to sleep or running off to the next business meeting. This whole thing of pillow talk is new to me. Maybe I'm just getting older? Who knows... I do have questions about this.... Do men do it for the girl? Is it theatrics because
they've been conditioned to try and bond mentally with a girl after sex for the girl's sake so they don't seem like a d*ckhead?  Do men simply feel this is a great opportunity to see if there are actually brains behind the beauty so he will know if he should ask her to dinner prior to sex next time? Do men like to do this for themselves because they aren't complete animals and do desire intimacy after physical needs are met? Is this simply girlish desires of intimacy and physical touch in reverse?  I just don't get it.

Here's what prompted the quandary to begin with:

My latest joy ride had the pure adrenaline rush and enjoyment of a girl lap dancing on top of his erogenous appendage to LMFAO Sorry for Party Rockin and when finished with his 'release' fell fast asleep.

I have a rule.  It's a simple one.  And it's only one.  Don't spend the night.

This rule doesn't work for every girl but it works for me. On occasion (pending the company) this rule is bent to "don't spend the night unless invited." However, in my world most often I decline anyway. I'm not cold-hearted.... (well, maybe a little....) I'm just not into it...

It's not that I don't enjoy cuddling. Quite the contrary. It's simply that I don't feel the need to get comfortable and fall into the trap of creating bonds with someone I knowingly don't want all because it felt good at the time. I don't cuddle with strangers.

When sticking to my rules I find lines don't get crossed as easily establishing clearly defined boundaries for a man.  In this same way he understands plainly and clearly I wasn't conquered (because I wanted it for me) and that I don't have attachment issues. It pretty much spells out "Not the girl having sex looking for love. Just the girl entertaining amazing sex." This way I can be clear that I don't want anything more from him and that he's not material worth keeping. Is it so hard to imagine a girl simply enjoyed the same physical touch he did?

What delights me most is when my leaving takes him by surprise (as if I were a hopeless romantic - which I secretly am) and I'm looked at as callous.

Yes, some girls are like this. Why? Well.. does it matter? Because the truth is, I'm not sleeping with nice guys. I'm sleeping with the bumbling a**holes who think they can take advantage of a girl who wrote the playbook to whatever f*ed up game he thinks he's playing. There's no ego trip for him here. He will always be left to wonder why I didn't stay. Why I'm not a typical girl. And with that, his lingering question "was his sex bad?" will play in his mind for a while. Not my issue. Not my insecurity. I make no apologies.

We've all had our ups and downs in love. Maybe it's not really so hard to understand how men and women aren't truly that different. -I*V




(Originally posted 12/14/2012)

Pillow Talk ... I Just Don't Get It!

I know in my last chapter I mentioned not staying the night. But, I did cross a line with my latest victim... er... suitor. I didn't mean to. It's just that he was kinda cozy while I adjusted my pulse to normal levels and indulged in a few (very few) minutes of cuddling after what turned out to be high caloric burning sexcapades. I tried to lull him to sleep afterwards. I was married once and some habits die hard. But the truth is I was hoping he'd fall fast asleep so I could sneak out... No questions asked, just an easy escape!

While making my great escape I fumbled accidentally making a ruckus trying to find my panties he threw across