Losing Faith & Being a Mistress

I always believed in God when I was married to a sinister man.
                  So what's the deal with God & I these days?

I met a married man.
                          .....Again.
It's an ongoing theme in the story of my life.  :)


      His fantasies are like-minded and interlaced with intimacy.  Married men are a fantasy that's good for the soul...especially for a girl who pretends she want something real but who truly just wants the highlights of any relationship.

      Innocent fun.. until it's no longer innocent.
That's why it's only via emails and not at all based in reality. The problem that comes into play is that this girl does desire romance and true friendships that can help her in her journey to success... But again I ask, where is the line between friendship and romantic interest?
Where is the line between flirting and moving in to territory you know doesn't belong to you because you also know it might be nice just for a few nights...

Am I a good girl trying to be bad?  Or am I a vixen in every sense of the word? It's true I try to be good and then something turns in me and I take men down for the kill. Do I do this just because I enjoy it?  What happened to my moral consciousness?  Do I even have morality when it comes to relationships anymore?

.."all's fair in love and war"...

What goes around comes around..  And if that's true then it means I get everything in life I desire, deserve, and want in my do-over life (i.e. life after divorce). Why? Because I put out more love, all my being for God and for a man, and for family ... and still ended up here - Broken.  Divorced. Not to mention it all happened at a pivotal time when my sex drive kicked into high gear. It seems these days my sensuality can make little boys  with ambition linger (read men in their 20s here) and grown men run!

I know better than to mess with men with wedding rings.. It's just not lady like... I am certainly a lady.. But this guy... the married man I met ... he gets me. For a girl like me that's something rare in itself..  I love the way he writes to me..

Then... I saw a picture of his wife and how beautiful she is. That knocked me back to reality.  She's gorgeous.  She is full of life.  She's amazing and intelligent. So, why is he online with me?  This is certainly a part of men I don't understand.

Wives, hold your men close.  F*@K them until you can't give anymore.  Otherwise, they stray.  Don't be mad he's looking up hotties on line when you're the one always saying 'no.'

You want to keep a man... then give a man what he's looking for. More importantly, don't forget to get yours...over.. and over.. and over again... until he can't give you anymore...

- I*V

#JustMyThoughts
(InvincibleVictoria.com)


(Originally Posted 4/19/2013)